In many occasions, people questioned why I choose down that path. It is usually a path sensible people will not choose. Probably, I was influenced by my mother who would say what she wants to say without considering twice.
Over the weekend, I was having a chat with a person. I was sharing my own experience about that “when I allowed myself to be, caring more about myself, I feel I am kinder to others.” She suddenly turn to me and said “you know what? I think you have some kind of… developmental disorder like Aspergers or some kind.” To be honest, I was a bit shocked but this wasn’t a new suggestion to me. I suspected myself was at one stage of my life but never been diagnosed with it. Then she continued “well, you know sometime your words are quite sharp and it seems like you never considered the feeling of others.” Yes, again, that wasn’t a surprise to me too. People did said that to me before. Then, I thought a bit and remembered why I am who I am and respond “to be honest with you, I never been diagnosed with such disorder, however I suspected I might. Going through life I have learnt that if there are possibility that if there’s any possibility for me to save or change a life or a day of a person, I rather say it out than hold it back because I have been through some deaths and regret that I wasn’t able to pass on what I would like to. Since then, I have decided to say what I wanted to say and when I wanted to say.” She then moved on.
Never be shaken, no matter what happens or what others may say.
Never be frustrated; never lose confidence.
This is the way we should strive to our lives.
Being able to do so is a sign of genuine character.Daisaku Ikeda
This conversation did tested me out of my confidence about myself. I slept with it and decided that I am not going back there where I was second guessing that feeling of others and suppressed my feeling and expression and then regret as an outcome.
Even when its summit is buffeted by harsh winds and snowstorms, Mount Fuji stands tall and unwavering.
Please become people of conviction as indomitable as this great mountain.
Please become people of character as lofty and dignified as this majestic peak.Daisaku Ikeda
I know it doesn’t mean that you do not listen to what others may say. For me, I will consider to take it in and will take in if it will take me to where I want to be.
What will you take in today?
How confident are you about yourself?
Where would you like to go?