When you catch up with a long-time friend…

I met with a high school friend. We went to same high school and since then we meet every now and then for catch up. 10 years ago, she decided to move oversea for good. Now, living with her family.

It was a coincidence I texted her this time. I thought about her so I texted to see how she’s going. She replied that she was in the country so we met.

I don’t know whether because I am yet to get married or have a kid or living in current country or my recent growth, it was fascinating interacting with her this time. Probably everything was interrelated. She was so embedded in her current culture which suppressed all her beauties and strength.

What do I mean by that?
She was a mum with a pressure to raise her children well. She used words such as “as a child she had to…” or “in such circumstances, a child should…” I couldn’t help myself to interrupt her every time she made such comments. Indeed, getting married, having children were her choice but clearly she isn’t happy where she is.

Expectation is the mother of all frustration.

Antonio Banderas

Expectation is the root of all heartache.

William Shakespeare

I am not a parent so I might not see what my friend was seeing in relation to children. However, I saw that she’s limiting the opportunities for her children by filter through with a lens of expectation. Without realising, she had given limited opportunities for her children to try. Not because she was raised like that but her cultural norm pushed her to think it is the norm.

When was the last time you question your perspectives?
What will you do when your friend is full of expectations?
How would you like to approach them?

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