I spent a relatively extensive time with my families and relatives for last two days. It was longer than I used to be. Before I spent time with them, I knew their tendency that they are very bounded by their traditional culture and norm. So, I was aware there were a tendency for me to get back to my old self, and by doing so, I will become very angry about myself.
So what happened after all?
Without realising much, I was back in my old role as who I used to be. It was easier and familiar. I used to take the lead in organising a function. Not because I loved doing it but I was forced to it. At one stage, I thought it was quicker to do it rather than asking others to do it. Eventually, I’ve realised that by doing so, taking up all the responsibilities, I have caused more work for myself and not allowing others to grow.
Chains of habit are too light to be felt until they are too heavy to be broken.Warren Buffett
Change might not be fast and it isn’t always easy.
But with time and effort, almost any habit can be reshaped.Charles Duhigg
When I realised that I was allowing myself to slip back to where I used to be, I actually laugh at myself as my supervisor said “It will take you awhile to break that habit.” Even though I was able to move away from it for awhile, if I wasn’t cautious enough about my own behaviour, everything will slip back to where I used to be, just like elastic bands.
Parents will still make negative comments about everything and enforce their judgement on others. Other adults would not stand for themselves but allowing others to penetrate their space which led to frustrations and complains behind the back.
So what have I decided to do?
I have learnt to stand firmly on the ground and share with others how I feel about their comments which did not consider others’ efforts. No one have to do anything if they wish not to do so, including children.
The truth is, you don’t break a bad habit;
you replace it with a good one.Denis Waitley
I am yet to find the replacement of this habit. Probably, I have learnt to laugh at myself, reflect on it, and try again. A step closer in my journey to where I want to be.
How do you break your behavioural habits?
What habits do you want to break?
What does it mean to you?