How do I determine my progress?

I didn’t know how to determine my progress in life. I didn’t know how to determine how far I have come. Well, to be honest, I was too afraid to evaluate my progress because I know it will be dreadful to find out I haven’t moved much. I might have changed my accessories along the way but I am still the same person at the core. Can’t feel the change.

It is very interesting when every 6 months, somehow I had opportunity to evaluate myself. It can be a tool that I have evaluated before. It can be someone telling me about my achievements.

So 8 months ago, I undertook DiSC profile. Well, back then, I was still searching for my true self. It didn’t clarify much about me though. This survey consisted a series of multiple choices questions. It will consist four words that illustrate a person. You need to choose what’s most likely about you and what’s least likely about you. Then, they will profile you based on the combination and strength of four styles which were: Dominance; Influence; Steadiness; and Compliance. They can give you both your conscious and unconscious behaviours. I will leave further explanation to their site.

Unconscious behaviours are the behaviour that are natural to you. Eight months ago, I was very strong in Influence, closely followed by Steadiness and Compliance. Influence style are talkative, sociable, optimistic and friendly. Steadiness style are clam, helpful, patient, modest and laid back. Compliance style are precise, logical, matter-of-fact, analytical and careful. In my conscious behaviours, I was kind of levelled out but strong in steadiness and compliance style.

From there, eight months later, my profile is different again. Very interesting. So, my unconscious behaviour was very high in compliance, followed by steadiness and influence. Consciously, my steadiness style was the strongest followed by compliance and influence.

What does this mean? I have no idea. I am waiting for someone to explain this to me. I guess, eight months ago, I felt all responsibilities were on my shoulder. I didn’t know I had choice. Everything is happening because it meant to be and I didn’t know I can put boundaries. I was people pleaser and rescuer. I had so many rigid rules and values that I have placed in my life. I felt I was heavily chained to all these believes that I had enforced to myself. I probably was more empathetic then because my mothering/nurturing energy was extremely strong.

Now, I know when to act when I choose to. I am probably not as empathetic as I used to be but I don’t have rigid rules that I was enforcing on others and felt very upset when they didn’t meet my expectations. I do things based on my choice and willingness. I have understand that I don’t have to share every part of my life and resources with every person around me. I am aware now that I don’t have to rescue everyone from their non-nonthreatening life problems, and in turn, that enhance the learning of that person. I learnt how to keep quiet but speak when I choose to. My behaviour is now based on my values.

Ability is what you’re capable of doing.

Motivation determines what you do.

Attitude determines how well you do it.

Lou Holtz

Because I make decisions based on my core values, I feel confident in making decisions about myself. I am now aware I can only influence my own self.

How far have you come?
How can you evaluate your progress?
Are you celebrating your achievements?

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